I know what you are thinking I thought your blog was about being a parent and mental health issues, well you are right but I have some advice to share.
I felt very inspired to write this today after a lady who had come to see E in the hope to offering him and us as a family some emotional support, she remarked on how close and open the communication is between my husband and I.
Now a little back history I have had so many horrible relationships in the past, you know the film and book ‘he’s just not that into you’ well I thought that was based on me like someone had actually been following me my whole dating history. My husband has not had a good experience in this either.
Fate really did bring us together, and the day I met him I knew he was what I had gone through hell for (more about the hell part will be explained another day). I believe we have healed each other.
Since we got together we have had people try to split us up on several occasions and at one point for all of two weeks they succeeded but we knew what we had was more special than letting others get to us. We have had so many things thrown at us since E came to live with us, struggles with him and K, issues with his mother and step father, court, school drama, counselling, the list is endless. But one thing remains constant my husband and I remain united.
How have we done this well we talk, we have each others back, we don’t hold back on what is bothering us and we both have our own methods for cooling down. In fact we have only had one argument in almost 8 years.
Things I have learnt since being married:
- Don’t go to bed on an argument or disagreement (old fashioned but its true)
- Always let that person know they are it for you, making people jealous isn’t fun for anyone.
- I always say I love you before bed (my aunt gave me this advice on my wedding day).
- Don’t keep quite discuss what is bothering you, similar to don’t ask don’t get theory.
- Spend time apart, being independent from each other is healthy.
- Don’t take the other for granted.
- Be kind always.
- Sometimes it is best to walk away from a disagreement to re group your thoughts than stay and make it worse or say something you can’t take back.
- Have different interests it’s healthy.
- Have contact with each other daily my husband and I always cuddle, hold hands, etc daily, usually many times a day it is good for both of you.
All of the above I believe is why we have survived what we have in our 8 years together.
If you have any relationships questions please feel free to ask.
Have a great day.